Tuesday, May 5, 2009

A note on how to Console

There is something I would like to share to those of you who are in a position to comfort a person who has lost someone. Like I have said before, there isn't a pat answer or a road map but there are a few things you may want to consider.

The loss a person feels is usually relative to the relationship shared between them and the deceased. Don't assume that you understand what that relationship was. This will probably stop you from saying something that will only make the person feel worst. Don't state the obvious, we know there in a better place. It does very little to comfort the person anyway. Allow that person the time and space they need, try not to determine what that is for them. Most of all just be there love them, love is an action word not a feeling. Do things, clean the house, wash clothes make phone calls or just hold them. When you see them crying, try to push back the urge to say something comforting, a hug usually does the trick. :0)

I am no doctor or psychologist, just a woman who went through a really hard time surrounded by people who loved me, but had no idea of how to help.

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